Children who are "disciplined" and "regardless of teaching" from an early age will lead two lives after 20 years.

recently, I saw a video on the Internet:

A child is making a noise in the library, while the reader reminds the child to say "be quiet".

but the child's mother thought the child had been insulted, argued with her for nearly 20 minutes, and urged her to apologize.

netizens in the comment area criticized

"Why children are noisy in the reading area."

"to support a child is not the way to do it."

it was also the child who did something wrong, while the educational attitude of another parent attracted a lot of applause from netizens.

just a few days ago, a naughty boy in Shenzhen mixed red beans and mung beans from the supermarket.

after his mother saw it, she asked him to reclassify the beans.

Mother and son had not finished picking for two hours, and finally the supermarket staff said that they didn't have to pick any more.

after her child made a mistake, the mother did not only educate her verbally, but asked her child to make up for the mistake with actions and lead her child to take responsibility. During these two hours, the boy also understood the consequences of his actions.

in Family Education, Spencer said that after a child makes a mistake, if parents do not discipline them in time, they will reinforce the impression that "the child is right."

in the long run, the child's mistake today may be "not a big deal", but he may "make a big deal" tomorrow.

Shakespeare said, "the danger is inevitable because we tolerate the root causes of the disaster without correcting it."

the loss of a child's future is often caused by the indiscipline of his parents.

01

Children who lack discipline

will suffer greatly in the future

have seen such a news:

in a scenic spot, a 5-year-old boy, holding a stick with barbed thorns, beat the tourists passing by one by one, but the parents who stood by did not stop it.

at this time, a girl came over, took away the stick and taught the child a lesson.

the girl told the child, "if he hits someone with a stick again, hit him with this stick."

the boy nodded in fear.

the boy's parents were around, but connived at the child's misbehavior.

this time the child hits someone with a stick, but the parents don't care. If the child cuts someone with a knife next time, I'm afraid it will be too late to take care of it.

when parents were young, regardless of teaching their children's out-of-line behavior, it was too late to wait until their children's character was shaped before they wanted to discipline them.

Liu Zongyuan said in the Legend of planting Guo Ligularia Camel: "although it is called love, it actually harms it."

parents' laissez-faire to their children seems to release his nature, but they are actually harming him.

Children whose parents are undisciplined will certainly be disciplined for you;

those children who have never been properly disciplined are malignant tumors in society and will be beaten by society sooner or later.

Professor Li Meijin, who studies the psychology of juvenile delinquency, once shared a rape criminal's feelings about her father in a lecture.

he said, "my father is so kind to me!"

when I was 9 years old, I raped a little girl in the neighborhood and was educated by the public security organs. when my father learned of this, he could not bear to see me punished and immediately helped me straighten things out. Later, when I came back from the army, I immediately helped me find a job. "

after doing this, the father said earnestly to his son, "son, that's all I can do for you. I can't do anything else!"

Professor Li Meijin said, "this father has never instilled the right ideas in his children."

what the father did made the child think that he could evade punishment if he made a mistake, that what he needed was given with both hands at any time, and that what he wanted could be forcibly extorted.

do not realize that once some things are done, there is no turning back.

it is the father's lack of education for his children from an early age, the cover-up and connivance of his children after making mistakes, which causes the children to fall step by step.

British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher once said:

your thoughts will become your words;

your words will become your actions;

your actions will become your habits;

your habits will become your character;

your character will become your destiny.

I have heard a saying that excellent children are controlled by their parents, and bear children are used to by their parents.

the fate of children is hidden in his every word, every behavior, and every habit.

parents' discipline of their children determines their children's future fate.

02

children who have been well managed will have a broader road in the future

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some people say: "whether the child's path is straight or not depends on the inadequacy of the parents' discipline."

Li Ruotong, the goddess of youth, once mentioned in an interview that whenever she made a mistake when she was a child, her father would beat her with a cane.

Li Ruotong's parents raised ten children. Because of their large number of children, their father worried that they would go the wrong way, so they were strictly educated from an early age, and laid down a lot of rules for them, such as:

"picking up food can only pick up the food in front of you, not the food in front of others; when eating, you can't pick up the rice, you have to pick it up and eat it; you have to finish all the rice in the bowl and don't waste a grain of rice."

if their brothers and sisters go out to play together, one of the naughty ones has committed a crime, and all the others present will be beaten, but after being beaten, no one will dare to commit a crime again.

the host said, "the cane hurts."

Li Ruotong said: "it hurts, butOnly pain can remember it! "

Li Ruotong also said frankly: "none of our ten brothers and sisters have gone bad or gone the wrong way because of my father's strict discipline."

what parents fear most is that their children take the wrong path.

it is precisely because Li Ruotong's father is strict with his children's education that he makes his children understand how to be an upright person.

Professor Qian Wenzhong of Fudan University said: "there must be an element of pain in education."

although we do not encourage beating and scolding education, pain is inevitable in disciplining children.

how cruel parents are when they discipline their children, the more smoothly their children will go in the future.

Liang Qichao said: "A hundred years of life is based on early childhood."

the fate of a child depends on what kind of education he received in his childhood.

some people say, "Education is ultimately for the future development of children."

I think so.

Education is a short-term goal, while a child's future is a long-term goal.

parents' discipline today is so that their children can understand how to go tomorrow.

Children who were well disciplined by their parents when they were young will not lose their way, and their future life will be open and bright.

03

the critic Maofuru said: "the reason for a person's failure lies in the shortcomings in his character."

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as the saying goes, "if you don't repair a young tree, you can't go straight; if you don't fix it, you will be valiant."

when parents discipline their children, they are actually helping their children and trimming away the shortcomings in their character.

parents should discipline their children well in their childhood in order to cultivate their child's character and ensure that he will not fail in his future life.

build "others" in the hearts of children

Ming Dynasty thinker Lu Kun said: "selfishness is an obstacle to getting ahead of others."

my best friend has a special way to guide children not to be selfish:

my best friend will remind children at all times that the world doesn't just revolve around you.

for example, if her husband works overtime, she will ask the child to pick up some of each dish, put it on a clean plate and leave it to his father.

when they eat at home, she will let the child give it to others first, and then give her the same share.

when you go to the amusement park, if there are other children waiting to play with a toy, then she will set a fun time for the child, and when the time comes, she will give it to other children, so you can't occupy the toy all the time.

under the guidance of her best friend, her daughter can think of others and never be overbearing and selfish when she does anything.

Li Meijin said: "when children only need to take care of themselves in a home, it is actually parents who allow their children to be selfish."

selfish children only think about themselves, can't share, don't know how to be grateful, and only know how to take.

there have been psychological studies that the more selfless parents are to their children, the easier it is to educate selfish children.

if you want to make children unselfish, parents should not only have children in their eyes, but also have "others" in their hearts.

make rules for children