Beautiful morning light, accompany you to read.
have you ever had such an experience:
when you get along with others, you are always cautious, lest you do something wrong and make others unhappy;
for other people's requests, you never dare to say "no". No matter how difficult it is, you will bear the brunt of it.
many times, we please others again and again because we care too much about what other people think and want to be "good people" in the eyes of others.
even if others hurt themselves and feel very uncomfortable, you should pretend to be light, force a smile and say "it doesn't matter" to others.
but do you know? The injury can never be remedied.
you try your best to please others, forgive others generously, and it is you who suffer.
blindly patient, the only pain is that I went shopping with my friend Qinqin a few days ago. On the way, her phone suddenly rang. It was from an old classmate who had not been in touch for a long time.
after a few pleasantries, the other party stumbled and asked Qin Qin for a favor.
after listening to Qin Qin, she frowned and said, "Yes, you can, don't worry, I can solve it."
after hanging up the phone, Qin became absent-minded.
I saw her sigh and say:
I looked at her questioningly: "then why didn't you just say that you are not free and can't help?"
Qin Qin said to me in embarrassment:
after hearing this, I shook my head helplessly and felt sorry for Qin Qin very much.
in life, in order to become people who are "easy to get along with" in our hearts, we carry all our grievances and injuries on ourselves again and again, preferring to suffer from ourselves, but also to fulfill others.
however, not all people will appreciate your hard work and the pain you have carried in silence.
if you give in again and again, you will only take it for granted in the eyes of others;
is too easy to get along with, and what you get will only make you tired.
remember that there is a saying:
when you meet unfriendly people, don't just give in. When you meet someone who has hurt you, don't easily choose to forgive.
otherwise, you will always be good for others and suffer for yourself.
people can be kind, but there can be no bottom line.
there is a saying:
everyone's goodness is very precious. If you use it in the wrong place, it is not only a waste, but also connives at other people's evil.
so, no matter how kind you are, you need to keep a certain edge.
Don't agree to anything that breaks your principles and bottom line, no matter how soft you are.
Wu Jun, a former senior executive at Google and Tencent.
an old friend came to him and asked him to help arrange an internship for his children in two big companies.
Wu Jun, who has always been kind-hearted, refused after reading his resume.
after seeing Wu Jun's firm attitude, the other side no longer made it difficult for Wu Jun to help introduce him.
later, someone asked him why he had been ruthless and refused other people's request this time.
Wu Jun replied faintly:
"if you can help, you must help; if you are beyond your ability, you must not help."
he feels that the children of old friends are not capable enough, and even if they are forced to make arrangements, it will be difficult not only for themselves, but also for others.
Yes, people can be kind, but they must not be without their own principles and bottom lines.
A friend who really understands you will not hold a grudge against you for a reasonable refusal, nor will he impose his burden on you.
your kindness and warmth only need to be left to those who are grateful.
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as the saying goes, there is a measure of kindness and tolerance.
remember, know how to repay goodwill with sincerity and resist malice with sharpness, this is true kindness!
Don't easily forgive those who hurt you
remember a short story you read a long time ago.
there is a little boy who always loses his temper uncontrollably.
so his father told him:
later, the little boy's bad mood was gradually brought under control, but at this time, although there were no nails on the wooden railing, he was already riddled with holes and devastated.
in fact, like this wooden railing, we silently connive at the evil of others and let ourselves get hurt again and again.
in the end, others are satisfied, but they are only covered with scars.
I have heard such a saying:
if you give to the wrong person, you will only get a chill;
forgiving to the wrong person will only bury hidden dangers.
Don't be a "soft persimmon" and let others cajole your kindness and take advantage of your softness.
sometimes, your patience and kindness will only become a sharp weapon for them to hurt you.
learn to be ruthless and don't easily forgive the people who hurt you, so that you can live a more comfortable and happy life.