"look old at three years old, look old at seven years old". In fact, there are early signs of raising or abandoning a child!
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I took my children to a nearby restaurant two days ago. When I sat down, I heard a "clatter" coming from the next table.
A four-or five-year-old boy is standing on a chair to urinate.
Dad whistled to him with bulging cheeks, and his mother took the trash can, and the family cooperated so well!
A big brother at the next table really can't stand it:
do you teach children like this? Let the child urinate at the dinner table!
how do other people eat? It's not like there's no toilet!
the parents, who did not show weakness, shouted:
"the child can't hold it any longer. How can you fix it if you don't pee?" Are you fighting with a kid? "
"who doesn't have a child? Pretentious what? "
watching the little boy walking around the turntable as if no one was around, I suddenly ate the radish and worried about it.
what will happen to the future of a child growing up in such a family?
it is true that children are young and not sensible, but as the saying goes, "look old at three years old and look old at seven years old".
whether a child's future is foreseeable or not can already be seen in childhood.
as Professor Li Meijin said, "parents' early education is the foundation of children's lifelong happiness."
the better early education, the less likely children will have various problems in the future.
those laziness that have been stolen in children's early education will become a pit on the way for children to grow up.
disciplining children is about the key period.
I have met many helpless parents who refuse to listen and scold their grown-up children.
when they had no choice but to tell me about their children's problems, I had only one feeling that it was "too late".
because they missed the best period of psychological education.
on Zhihu, a mother once posted a question: "what if my son is spoiled by his grandmother and has a bad temper?"
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it turned out that when her son was less than one year old, she and her husband went to work in other places, leaving her son at home for grandma to take care of.
Grandma always spoils her without principle, which leads to children's arrogance, capriciousness and bad temper.
when her son goes to primary school and often fights with her classmates, she realizes that if she doesn't care about the child, it will be really too late!
in the UK, there is a documentary "7UP" that has been filmed for more than 60 years, and each episode begins with this sentence.
in 1964, James Bond British director Michael Apted began to record 14 7-year-old British children, finding them every seven years and photographing their latest conditions. it turns out that
those children who received a good early education before the age of 7 and accompanied by their parents tend to develop well.
Children who lack early education and lack of parent-child relationship tend to be more depressed in adulthood.
Why is the first seven years of a child so important?
many people think that the child is not sensible and will be fine when he grows up.
but in fact, children make mistakes when they are young, and adults do not discipline them in time. Once the child's temper and character is formed, it is very difficult to adjust later.
the more far-sighted parents are, the more they know how to take care of their children, as soon as possible.
"look old at three years old, look old at seven years old". What are you looking at?
many parents are afraid that their children will lose at the starting line, spell Mathematical Olympiad, spell English, fight key primary schools, and fight for school district housing.
in fact, it really doesn't matter how many words children can read, how many questions they can do and how many poems they can recite before the age of seven.
in fact, we should be more concerned about the character of our children than our grades.
because character determines fate more than ability. This is the conclusion drawn by Professor Li Meijin's many years of experience.
the cultivation of a child's character in his early years determines the fate of his life.
I have seen a documentary, "Rich Brother and Poor Brother".
talk about a pair of brothers, they are one year apart and grew up together, but when they reach middle age, they take two completely different paths in life.
my brother, Ivan, is a successful entrepreneur, worth ten million yuan, lives in a large villa, has a positive and optimistic attitude, and is a model for successful people.
on the other hand, my younger brother David is a complete loser, living around in a dilapidated truck, living without a fixed abode and having no fixed income to support himself by taking odd jobs.
Why are they so different when they are brothers?
the great difference in life has long been buried in their childhood.
my brother Ivan, who was strictly disciplined by his mother from an early age, grew up "poor" and had to do everything.
I have been walking other people's dogs since I was eight years old, delivering newspapers every morning and going to work in the supermarket in the evening.
when he was very young, my brother understood the need to use his own labor to get results, and developed the habit and character of independence, diligence and optimism, self-discipline and self-discipline.
my younger brother David, because he is young, has always been spoiled by his family, so he doesn't have to do anything for his family.
gradually formed the habit of holding out clothes, unable to control emotions, full of complaints about life, lazy, arrogant, negative personality also engraved into the bones.
one is bombastic, the other is down-to-earth.
one is always complaining, the other is always trying.
one is constantly taking, the other is always independent.
the latter is becoming more and more successful, the former is getting worse and worse, and they are living two completely different lives.
in children's early education, the qualities and habits formed have the power to run through time, and in the long years, they will eventually affect the child's life..
Children before the age of 7
far-sighted parents never slack off on these three things
Professor Li Meijin divided a person's life into several stages, among which, the child before the age of 7 is the key period of character formation.
parents seize this golden period to help their children shape their character and develop good habits, which will benefit them for a lifetime.
parents with foresight will never be lazy on these three things--
Canadian psychologist Gordon Neufeld once said that there are almost always relationship problems behind many behavioral problems of their children.
behind many children's rebellion and disobedience, there is a lack of attachment to their parents.
Professor Li Meijin once told a case in a lecture that there was a father in Zhuhai who went out to work when his child was very young and earned millions in just a few years.
but when he got home, he found that his son was always playing truant and causing trouble, and wanted to start taking care of the children, only to find that he could not control them at all.
because of the lack of early emotion, it has caused the estrangement between parents and children.
as parents, only by establishing attachment with young children can we accumulate enough psychological capital to discipline their children and have the power to guide them.
2 refrain from being self-willed and learn to say "no" to your child
True love is to teach him patience and restraint while properly satisfying him.
before the child is 7 years old, when unreasonable demands are not met, he often cries and rolls all over the floor.
in the face of their children's unreasonable demands, parents can consciously "exercise restraint and willfulness" to their children and say "no" firmly and gently to their children.
the child will gradually learn that wayward crying is useless, and parents will not satisfy him every time.
3 it is human instinct to prevent selfishness, cultivate empathy and let children see others
"selfishness", because it is the awakening of self-consciousness.
but in the process of children's growth, we should slowly cultivate children's empathy and let them have others in their eyes.
for example, when we eat, we should set up a table with our children: we can't just think about ourselves, we can't serve all the food we like, but also take care of others.
Children may be unhappy at first, but only when people feel their own pain can they feel the pain of others. Only then can they learn to empathize and cultivate empathy.
Education expert Ringer once said:
when it is time to educate and take care of their children, parents should never neglect the company of their children under the pretext of being busy at work.
in old age, all honors and money are fleeting, and a useless child is enough to make your evening scene bleak. "
companionship and guidance in early education is not only the starting point of all upbringing, but also the foundation of children's lifelong behavior habits.
on the way of education, it is the parents who should not be lazy and the children who should not be released.
only by not missing the growth of the child, can we not regret the future of the child.
encourage each other.