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many parents hope that their children can become excellent talents and achieve something when they grow up, but it is very tortuous in the way their children grow up.
there is such a kind of education in China, which is called "releasing the nature of children" by the majority of parents!
but many children grow up in this way of education and do not grow up as their parents imagine. on the contrary, they become uneducated, undisciplined, and become out-and-out "bear children" in everyone's eyes.
A Tsinghua professor once said angrily:
these points are distorting the growth of children.
blindly releasing their nature
will only destroy their children
many parents think that "noisy" is the nature of their children, and they should be tolerated and let them release their nature as much as they can.
in fact, tolerating the child's mischief and protecting the child's improper behavior is not a way to "release the child's nature", but a way to push the child into the abyss.
once saw a piece of news that an injury occurred on a high-speed railway passing through Jiaxing South Railway Station.
there are several children making trouble in the car, and a man really can't stand it, so he reminds the parents of the child and let them take care of it.
as a result, the child's parents were so angry that at last the mother slapped the man in the face.
due to the hard hitting process, the man's glasses were discounted and his left eyeball was bleeding.
when the reporter interviewed Ms. Cha, the beater, she responded like this:
in this matter, we can come to the conclusion that behind every arrogant bear child, there is an ignorant parent!
these days, many people regard their children as releasing their nature, such as screaming, rudeness, impoliteness, talking too much, robbing, and so on.
how sad it is that what you think of as a release of nature is actually seen by others as uneducated and barbaric.
nowadays, many parents are reluctant to let their children endure hardships, saying that they want to give their children happiness and freedom and release their children's nature, so they unwittingly release their children.
We must see the bad habits behind this nature, such as selfishness, capriciousness, nonsense, laziness, ignorance and so on.
therefore, any parent should have a correct understanding of releasing nature.
I think there must be a yardstick for releasing children's nature. if children release their nature too much, they will become more and more disobedient as they grow up.
once excessive, bear child, barbaric, ill-bred, unruly will become synonymous with this kind of child.
A certain amount of release and tolerance is OK. There must be a clear boundary. Some things can be tolerated, but some boundaries can never be crossed.
as parents, they should give their children proper awareness of rules, rather than blindly release their nature, which will only destroy their children.
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unrestricted release of nature
is irresponsible to their children
Today, many parents raise their children into naughty and naughty bear children. in fact, this is not a sign of intelligence, nor is it called releasing nature.
if you allow your child to be naughty and unreasonable, you will only lead him to a path of no return.
especially in some public places, children make a lot of noise, do not think that this is the child's courage, not stage fright performance, perhaps at this time you and your child have been excluded by others.
it sounds good to release the nature of your children, but some parents always have a poor grasp of it.
then, education that releases nature becomes "junk education". Although it is very heart-wrenching to say it, it is a reality.
Last year, the news that a bear child burned a woman on a turntable caused a heated discussion among netizens.
the child is only 7 years old and goes to a restaurant with his family, but the child keeps turning the turntable with his hands because he is playful.
during the rotation, the kettle slid out of the kettle on the table, directly scalding his mother's friend Ms. Tang to a level 10 disability.
afterwards, the boy's mother refused to admit that the injury was caused by her son, instead thinking that the restaurant waiter put the kettle on the turntable and did not give a hint.
the boy's parents even think that the incident has caused mental harm to the boy.
in the end, the matter went to court, and the court held that what the little boy did was the direct cause of Ms. Tang's injury. The parents who were there at that time failed to stop it in time, so they should bear 80% of the liability for compensation and 20% of the responsibility of the restaurant.
this is the disaster caused by the release of the child's nature. If the child's parents could dissuade their children from playing with the turntable in time, be obedient in public and abide by the rules, then this might not have happened.
at this moment, I really want to remind parents that it is extremely irresponsible to release their children under the banner of releasing their children's nature.
because if the child's nature is bad and you don't control it, it will slowly become a malignant tumor and invade the child's mind step by step.
correctly release the child's nature
you must do these things first
stop believing in the words of releasing the child's nature, do the following, you are the qualified parent.
Fostering children's awareness of rules
cultivating children's awareness of rules is more important than you think.
especially when the child is young, we should pay more attention to the cultivation of his awareness of rules.
parents must let their children know what the rules are as soon as possible.For example, you can't take other people's things, obey traffic rules, don't jump the queue, don't litter, and so on.
so that the child will follow the rules, otherwise his actions will not be directed.
parents should guide their children to change from passivity to initiative, learn to restrain themselves, demand themselves, and consciously abide by various rules.
teach children what upbringing is
We all need upbringing, both adults and children, and for children, their upbringing comes from their parents.
as the saying goes, it is better to be poor and rich than to be brought up. Therefore, parents must teach their children what upbringing is.
Venus once mentioned his standard of parenting-- as long as children go to society without being annoyed. In fact, this is the most basic aspect of a child's upbringing.
parents should start with some basic etiquette so that their children can understand what upbringing is.
for example, don't make any noise in public, don't flip through other people's things, don't be rude to others, don't disrespect your elders, and so on.
if your child's behavior affects others, you must tell him that it is wrong to do so and correct it.
parents should never make excuses or excuses for their children, but should let their children take responsibility for their actions from an early age.
cultivate a child's awe
A child with awe will obey all kinds of rules, be respectful to others, and be rational and upright.
what is awe? Awe is a person's respect and fear of something.
this kind of "respect" is respect for things from the heart, this kind of "fear" is not a simple fear, but a warning and introspection of one's own behavior.
only children with awe can become more self-disciplined and self-conscious.
because "respect" will do something, it tells people what to do, "fear" will do something else, and it warns people what not to do.
this is not only an attitude towards life, but also a code of conduct and the great wisdom of life.
only by cultivating children's awe can children exercise self-discipline and consciously maintain order and rules and regulations in society, schools, and public places.
there is nothing wrong with "unleashing nature", but there must be a bottom line. I hope all parents can correctly understand what it means to release their nature and establish a regular "stocking" for their children.
parents should give their children enough love, not indulge them without a bottom line, give them enough freedom, but also establish appropriate boundaries.